Beautiful Vanilla

It was a beautiful evening, close to midnight. A full moon was decorating the cloudless sky, draping its light over the pool, the surrounding palm trees, and our lazy bodies.

Anita left us the first, and went to the atrium, doing whatever a woman of her caliber has to do. Then Minerva went inside, taking Lucinda with her, followed a few minutes later by Alejandra. So there i was, all alone with the moon and my thoughts. Episodes of my life passed by, overlapping each other timelessly as if they were one. Suddenly i found myself dreaming about my life with Shirah, the time i spent with her in Haifa, the Golan, the warzone in which she died, the pain that never had left me, and the bastards that still r killing my people. Unrest boiled up in my mind, rushing through my body, and taking over my soul. I needed to relax, to find something to distract me from the overwhelming desire to create havoc once again, and to sooth my upcoming rage.



So I went inside as well, to find the others.

As Lucinda saw me enter, she must have sensed my turmoil, and approached me with her firm gentleness, which is so characteristic for this wonderful woman, who once made her home on the streets of Bogotá. She feels me as i feel myself. As i felt Shirah. Her presence calms me down. She makes me hate less.

The others also know when it’s time to keep silent and to engage me in some kind of activity to bring me back to the here and now, far away from the horrors of the past, and my addiction to steer my thoughts back to times i refuse to forget.



We were going to watch a movie or 2.

The first one was: “My Sister’s Keeper”. An incredibly emotional movie about two sisters in their teens, and their family. One with incurable blood cancer, and the other one brought into this world as a supplier of body parts to keep the dying one alive. I’ve seldom seen a movie in which human emotions were portrayed so magnificently as in this one. While watching, we cried a lot, and felt much related. If people can be like that, without exempting anybody who played a role in this film, i’m willing to reflect on my rather negative views regarding vanilla people, and reconsider some of my attitudes towards them.

Our second choice: “The Blind Side”. A beautiful movie about truly warm human relations, and unconditional love against all societal odds, with Sandra Bullock playing the woman of my heart. A masterpiece. Well….um……ok then….this time i’ll go along with it. Again one which shows that there may be still a few vanillas around, whose friendship i could cherish. Remarkable and absolutely recommended.


The third one: “Inglourious Basterds”. Guess it was Anita who put that one into the player. She can’t stand it when i go soft, as mentally she’s going through a difficult time herself these days, and needs me more than ever to stand tall at her side, unforgivable, ready and eager to destroy all that caused her lose part of her womanhood. But i don’t think she would have done this, had she known what really was on that dvd.

Anybody who knows me a little bit, knows i hate fascists and Nazis, and all that, even remotely, comes with them. As this movie is about a group of jewish-american soldiers, dropped behind German lines some time b4 D-day, to slaughter any German soldier they would encounter, in order to create fear and demoralization among the supposedly invincible German troops, i cheered its contents, and thought i was in for a pleasant ride. Little did i know.

As the film evolved, my disgust was building. At the end i was sick to my stomach, as were my companions. Cruelty for the sake of cruelty. Torture as a way of entertainment. Killing for pleasure. That’s what the famous Quentin Tarantino had put on my plate. Well damn him, and the rest of his crew! I’m sure the man has never set foot on a battlefield, and has no clue of what’s really going on there. He must be a pitiful human being, craving to depict the lowest of human behavior imaginable. And not with the purpose to educate or warn people of what they’re capable of, but to deliver the filthiest of filth to entertain us. And if it was only him and his sick admirers, i wouldn’t even really care. It’s the masses that applaud his work which disturbs me. This filth harvested an Oscar, won other awards, and got nominated numerous times, and was / is scored higher by the public than the 2 other landmark movies i presented here, showing the ultra ugly face of members of vanilla society, their hypocrisy, indifference, ignorance, desire to hurt, and to glorify violence.

No matter how educated people like to present themselves, no matter how they try to come across as decent human beings, no matter their claim to have compassion and to crave integrity, honor, and honesty, when peeling off the first layers, their weak and pitiful persona surfaces in no time.

And for all of u, who only know the atrocities of this world from watching movies, the news, reading newspapers, or hearsay, i’ll repeat once more: There is no glory in killing people, there is no joy in watching ur enemy perish, there is no satisfaction when having destroyed an army, there is no honor in demolishing someone’s home. But there is sadness, guilt, and the feeling to have failed. I know, at times there will be a need to defend urself against the hordes of scumbags and lowlifes inhabiting this planet with us. I know i did, and willing to do it again! But u don’t go out there to kill them with pleasure. U don’t enjoy their agony when u take their life. And u don’t support the ones who do. Not even when sitting safely at home, letting others do ur dirty work. Cos if u do, u don’t deserve to live urself!




It was a beautiful morning, with clear skies, a warm breeze, and 5 hungry females. So we had a delicious breakfast.

Real Bimbos

Ahem.........who am i to say what real bimbos r, huh? I tell u what. I don't give a rat's ass what real really is. I know one thing tho: The ones who sell themselves as the real thing, r not that at all. A real bimbo never wants a sugar daddy taking care of her. A real bimbo never ever wants to be a male's trophy. A real bimbo is never ever someone's silly dumbass giggling doll. Oh sure, she can pretend to be like that, play like that, and fool the world splendidly, but in fact a real bimbo is a way above average intelligent, elegant, and sophisticated Alpha-Woman, eager to be enslaved by women like me. And yes indeed, a real bimbo is incredibly curvy at the right places. Which makes her stand out of the crowd, leaving the crowd in awe, and making her sisters with less blossomed bosoms green with envy.

There's a special kind of real bimbos too. A class apart so to speak, recognizable by their huge clits, aka She-males. Although i prefer GG's, i really love the ones who r as addicted to leather and rubber like me, and can walk in 6" heels as if they were dancing on clouds, seducing a pantheon of gods with their bodily movements and facial expressions. I often go out with creatures like that, creating havoc on the streets, in chic restaurants, and all kinds of prohibited areas were people, driven by dogmas, morals, protocols, and other stupid cultural prescribed phenomena, r gathering to convince themselves they're the chosen and righteous ones. The silly thing is tho, these creeps envy us, hahahahaha. Bunch of hypocrites, that's what they r.



For all u suckers, still suffering from stupid opinions, crawling up from stinking vanilla sewer systems, eventually making u feel guilty and miserable, and even forcing u in a way to consider to give up ur natural sexuality, i've uploaded a video of one of the best specimen of womanhood. Enjoy! And take to heart what the song is all about.

Oh yeah, for all u illiterate ones, who r too lazy to go out into the world and learn a few languages, read the subtitles lol.

Real bimbos? My ass! I simply call them, Bimbos. The rest? U mean the ones pretending? Oh those? Who cares!? But Bimbos they r NOT!



Post scriptum

As y'all can see in the comment section, someone going by the name of Tyggertom is questioning my description of bimbo. Not my Bimbo eh, but the general type, hehehe. So what does a woman who craves to be objective do? Call in an expert of cors. Here she is.

Ze Open Mind

The open mind is a beautiful thing. Still it pisses me off. Does this piss u off? Probably! U have an open mind of ur own no? What? U don't? R u out of ur mind? Must be, as i never met a person who told me she/he had a closed one. U r the first. U certainly r standing out of the crowd. Seems u have a mind of ur own. I like that. Good for u. Hit me up sometime. We could become friends, lovers even. Well um...... as long as u do as i say, or r a daughter of Lilith like me.

Online it's even worse. Many here have not only an open mind, but also a constant need to tell me how open their mind really is, and to convince me of their illusion that their mind is even more open than the one of their neighbor or some other dude on the block. More or less with the same frequency as is the case with males posing as females and screaming on their profile, .....no men, no men, no men. Nauseating!



It becomes even more disturbing when these open minds actually r resembling reinforced concrete with a twist. Ever met an individual who said: "Hey, listen up, i'm very open minded, and willing to try anything twice, but i won't engage in ...........", or, "I'm all for people to be free, and do as they like, provided that.............". And how about this one: "I hate it when people r prejudiced, base their opinions on stereotypes, and never learned to open up their mind. I'm so glad i don't belong to those assholes". That kind of open mind bearers? I'm sure u did. Maybe u r one of them.

So what did i do? I installed a fire wall. To save my mind from the open mind cultists, aka ROBCO's. At times tho, i can't resist. Then i go out into the wilderness again, to have a peek, and to drill a few holes in the open mind of the rigid and righteous ones. Just to help them from closing the damned thing completely eh? Told u. I'm a pure social worker at heart. Keep that in mind when watching the video.

Shadow-show

As promised, here r the first 2 pieces from my soon to be in the past Yahoo blogs.

To break, broke, broken.

Seems there r plenty people roaming Cyberspace, whose only intention is to break someone, or to be broken themselves. Hilarious. And so stupid too. There's a special breed of paper slaves, who believe a femdom should break them first, and then build them up again according to the wishes of the domina. Typical vanilla d/s, where the *dominant*is working her ass off, to make sure the banal desires of the*slave* r met.

And then we have of cors the club of *broken dommes*, women who once where cruel mistresses, fiery goddesses, or another silly creature of that kind, who suddenly (or after long and deep thinking) saw the light, realizing they truly wanted to be a lowly and inferior nobody, to be humiliated and dehumanized to the bone, by either a teenager, or a mature mommy in leather carrying a box of pampers.

As is the case with the majority of the *lesbians* in here (No male, no male, no male, can't you read you scumbag, no male no male no male), these people r mostly deranged gentlemen (or a bad variant of same), trying that way to become more attractive to the ladies. Guess in the end they'll end up with another poser, lol.

Now....don't worry eh.....and be happy u hear?! And don't forget to glue all the pieces together once ur done.

PS. Couple of days ago one of them broken ones declared she disliked it when people *can't spell a simple word like "you."*. So to ease her pain, i sent her this:

---Lmfao. I c u r a gr8 spelling snob 2. B4 u h8 me now...... :-*---

It really broke her heart, went to pieces even further, and removed my comment very dominantly without any mercy. A class act.

The psychology behind to break, broke, broken.

The wish/desire to break someone mentally and/or physically, is a sure sign of weakness. If this wish/desire is rooted in racism, fascism, nazism and filth like that, it's not only silly, but also objectionable and appalling. People with fascistic personalities r using d/s in general, and femdom in particular, as a smokescreen to hide their true character, which is described by Adorno et al, and many researchers of this phenomenon after them, as ego-weakness. People suffering from this, have a need to find scapegoats, without which, they can’t function. They also crave strict hierarchy, within which they need to trample and harass the ones who r placed beneath them (mostly the minorities in a certain society), and to worship and adore the ones who r placed above them. In short, a Befehl ist Befehl environment.

Since the birth of Internet, many of them have infested Cyberspace with their filth, playing as if they were strong men and women, emphasizing among other things on superiority cq inferiority of certain groups of people or plain gender, while in daily life they wouldn’t dare to act like that at all. In r/l these people would only come out of the closet, when supported and encouraged by larger groups of people, like for instance was the case in Nazi-Germany. One could say, that ego-weakness and cowardice r twins.

Of cors, in Cyberspace, there r also those, who r not really into fascism, who r not really seeking relief for their more or less forbidden feelings and socially disapproved of beliefs/attitudes etc. These ones just find their fun in upsetting other people, by acting as if they were nazis, or to stay more close to home, as if they were into breaking dommes, or to be broken themselves. Still they belong to the weak-ego clan as well, only hanging from a different branch of the moldering tree, which i consider symbolic for these people, and absolutely not even capable of breaking their mommy’s household rules. In fact they r longing for recognition, support, hugs, and other sweet things, but camouflage all this by posing as strict dommes, cruel masters, and……. well a whole range of other ‘powerhouses’. They’re unable to come forward with their true desires, settling for surrogate satisfaction instead.

In the Name of ............

Remember? Ok here goes #2. Even if u don’t.

Progress

Yahoo! is reprioritizing these days some products to deliver the best possible experiences to its consumers. BANG! There u have it! Written in stone. No more, no less. Like when they flushed 360 to the sewers little than a year ago, their one and only reason to cripple an already crippled Pulse even more now is: “……. an effort to make our service a relevant experience for the community.”

We, the consumers, r that important to Yahoo! Accompanied of cors by a few unimportant stockholders in the background, also just dripping from genuine altruism and concerned about our experiences.

Like it is with television, movies, forums, other social networks and similar entertainment areas, Yahoo! too goes with the crowd, the majority, and the holy ratings. All in the name of our wellbeing, satisfaction, growth, and best possible experiences. Well, that’s how they want things to look on the porch of their house of cards. In the back of it, greedy bookkeepers r counting the loot of the day, anticipating its cumulative growth in the future.

To hell with passion, depth, empathy, intensity, honesty, commitment, maturity, and responsibility. Hail to the vanilla clowns and clones, thriving on lies, deceit, and fake personas. Welcome to hypocritical gurus and false messiahs, celebrating uniformity, conformism, brainwashing, indoctrination, and obedience. Applause to mediocrity and its derivates. A curse on excellence, deviants, and people who r willing to explore and make a difference. Death to paradigm shifting, new opportunities, and hidden potential. Well, that’s the truth hiding in the back of their calculative mind. Their billboards and tabloids r screaming the opposite, in an effort to fool and indoctrinate the crowd even more.

The corrupted, corroded, and empty opinion of the majority is holy to them, as well as manipulating, molding and coercing people to cross over, and become part of that laughable herd. The will of the herd is law. Well….um…uh…. i mean….as long as it’s eagerly consuming the products of what brings the stockholders the revenues they’re after eh. It’s a superb example of the living democracy. The democracy of one-dimensional people. One ass, one vote.

Like i said, Yahoo! is not alone in this. Only brought forward by me now cos i’m active on their platform as well, and angered by their determination to continue killing a once promising and great thing, and selling this in the name of progress.
Expect a transfer of some of my Yahoo! blogs to Blogger in the coming days, as i don’t want them to go under with Pulse, nor to only linger in my archives till the time i want them to disappear forever.

When the sails r in rags
And stormy weather prevents
Hoisting new ones
When termites ate the oars
And i'm too weak
To row with my hands,
It’s then, when
I start my engines.

Forget it!

Yes people, it’s over! The time has come! Finally! Well….um…..it was here for a long time already of cors, but most of the vanilla d/s clique didn’t dare to embrace the reality regarding gender differences. And i’m not referring here to the silly contents of books like John Gray’s “Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus”, if u catch my drift!

Yes indeed, i’m talking about female supremacy. I’m even infamous for that. Do u mind?

Back in 2004 i wrote somewhere:

If u would have understood only a little bit about me, u would have realized, that if there’s one woman who’s ridiculing female supremacy, not believing one bit of so called male inferiority, and who was banned from many groups, forums, and r/l conferences, just for expressing this, it would be me.

And in 2005:

Some time ago there was a thread in here, discussing, among other things, one of the more popular works of Michio Kaku. The existence of more than 1 universe is not a theory anymore. Time warps and star gates r out of their science fiction phase. Of cors, the ones who only can function, and only can balance their life, when holding on to what they perceive as the truth and ancient common sense nonsense, will resist these findings. It never varies. Fear of changing their ways, which of cors r not theirs at all but implemented by their society, was always slowing down progress. If it was for these people, the earth would still be flat.

This fear is also one of the reasons, why femdom was degenerated to some tolerable variant of vanilla sex, or something that has its roots in ancient matriarchal cultures, cutting it wings, making it safe, and was/is invaded by guilt driven sissies, impotent males, men-hating females, frigid goddesses, trendy snobs, and of cors the orks and gollums from Middle Earth. And so, that bunch of weaklings invented and embraced the concept of female supremacy, to give weak females the illusion they aren't weak at all, but supreme beings who must be served by even weaker males, who can only thrive when feeling inferior and treated like dirt (on their terms of cors). Stinking co-dependency, that's what it is.

And so it went on for years, lol. Then, last year, i touched the nerve of a pro-domme, who btw was mentioned on my site b4, going by the name of Saharah Eve, when i wrote:

……… is exactly how i feel, and felt since day one actually, about this supremacy thinghy. If there's anything stupid and banal, especially within d/s, it's the concept of supremacy, and its nephews going by the name of superiority and inferiority. Femdom based, and thriving, on the supremacy principle, is simply stale vanilla fantasy, embedded in patriarchal dreams of submissive women acting like dominas, supported by females who can't live without their subbie-hubbie, or r keen enough to grab the opportunity to make a buck out of this nonsense.

Now was that a flaming collection of thoughts or what? Right!

Yes, that did it. That blew her fuse. She replied with a lengthy essay on the legality of female supremacy, trying to explain to us, among other things, that female supremacy is not necessarily equal to female superiority, bla, bla, bla.
A few quotes from this:

At its core, Female Supremacy is about ultimate authority, power and status belonging to the Female.
……….but that overall, their empathetic leanings and greater biological indispensability seat them in a higher social station over men.
I can state that females, as a whole, are more empathetic, more socially inclusive, less destructive/violent and less biologically expendable.
I wasn't laying out the logical thesis for my beliefs in Female Supremacy - - that would be a fairly lengthy dissertation.

Caramba, by Lilith’s superbly shaped body………..a dissertation? From one who believes in female supremacy from the beginning? Oh no! Not another proof based on ontological principles. Not a rehearsal of Thomas Aquinas’ silly and futile attempt to prove the existence of the divine! Spare me this crap! She would do better to keep on going to discipline her sub-humans, orchestra the production of her videos, continue to walk her male dogs in the park, and leave it at that!

A former friend of mine, called Sarah (no, no, no, not Saharah), said once to me with conviction:

Female Supremacy is the radical notion that Women can be better leaders for a better world.

Now, this was a very intelligent and compassionate sister, and still she was unable to be radical herself, to question her own beliefs on the matter, and to challenge the forces that kept her comfort zone alive. Being a deviant from the vanilla crowd as per definition, a femdom should do that u know, and i wonder what makes it so difficult for most women to act accordingly, and why they need to cling to the patriarchal concepts they say they abhor.

Certainly i can’t leave out Elise Sutton, Rasa von Werder, MZ BBW, and numerous other women advocating female supremacy as the natural order of life. Of cors i purposely left out male writers like William Bond, groveling at the feet of these females, as well as a zillion of female writers known to me as males, lol. Their motivation to support this banality has a different source, and is well known, hehe.
While compiling this blog i glanced at MZ BBW’s writings and found this:

Woman is the highest form of life and man should feel fortunate that She allows him to even co-exist with Her.

………… he is totally inferior and belongs at Her feet as Her obedient slave. It is Woman that is the decision maker, leader and Dominant species. Her wisdom is far superior and the best hope for humanity.

Female Supremacy cuts through all racial, age, and income barriers. Any Woman, regardless of what color She is, how old She is, where She is from or Her level of income, IS superior to any man. This is the core belief of Mine and one that I will always adhere to.

Well adhere as much as u like, i’d say. Keep conning urself. Resist to acknowledge the facts, and avoid as much as possible to pay attention to new research results regarding gender differences, while claiming ur convictions r based on undeniable scientifically found data at the same time. Guess opportunism and hypocrisy r celebrated as great personality traits of female supremacists as well, rofl!

Madam Elise and her kind, belong to a group of women, who r embroidering on patriarchal values and paradigms, and using questionable scientific findings to prove their point. Consequently, they're trying to embed the ways of the patriarch in a femdom environment, at the same time telling their audiences they r not, lol. Doing so, femdom becomes a joke, positioning the male as the primus inter paris, and the ‘domina’ as his servant. And to think, these women believe, they’re different from the rest of their vanilla sisters, hahahaha. Ah well, mundus vult decipi, ergo decipiatur!

One of the goals of science is to prove that certain isolated events r not restricted to that event per se, but could also be applicable to a broader spectrum of events. To make use of these generalizations for one’s own purpose is acceptable and maybe the right way to do. But to generalize an idea or belief just like that, without any significant back up, or worse, by pointing to a few alleged manifestations of that belief in one’s own environment or the writings of soul mates, is stupid, and belongs to the world of morons, ignorant, crackpots, and wannabes!

Although i’m not really standing in a friendly way toward the marketing techniques of pro-dommes like Saharah Eve, i still can make an exception for them, as they’re trying to make a living out of catering to the inner desires of their clientele, who wish and force them to be female supremacists, to be their cruel and sublime superiors, ready to punish and humiliate them when the price is right. Apart from a few, most of these women told me they have to go many extra miles to really get a buck out of their business. Reason why it was always hard for me to understand why they went into it from the beginning, as there r certainly more enjoyable and lucrative ways to achieve a financial utopia.

Be all this as it may, the “teachings” of pro-dommes, related to female supremacy and femdom, i usually take with a truckload of salt, as well as a kind-hearted smile.

Back now to the end of the female supremacy fallacy.

Below u’ll find a video featuring Cordelia Fine, a woman of much more substance than all others, referred to above, combined. As an impartial source, she may convince u of what i am claiming from the time i set my first steps in the realm of feminine femdom: Female supremacy is crap!

Compared to what i usually bring to u, this video is of considerable length, and will challenge the patience and intelligence of a few, if not all. If u make it through the first 10 minutes, hit the lower right button on the video screen, to be able to view the complete show, and to educate urself somewhat more.

To ease the pain a bit for the fervent and diehard believers of this supremacy nonsense, as well as for our cute little pink sissies here, i added a video by Peter McAllister regarding manthropology, explaining why males r becoming more and more pathetic, lol.

If after having watched the first one, and maybe even the second one, u still r not convinced that female supremacy is boloney, then tell me, what makes it so attractive for u to emphasize that females in general r so much better than males, with all the consequences attached to this belief, instead of throwing this notion of female supremacy into the garbage bin, and having exquisite sex, sublime communication, and a 24/7/365 life founded on the basis of emotional and intellectual equality, getting an extra impulse from being wired as a domina or a slave?

Um, and don’t forget to ponder a while on combining female supremacy with female slaves eh?

Vide cor Meum

I found her
In the slums of Bogotá
A wreck
Of unseen proportions
Spit out
By civilization

I held her
In the slums of Bogotá
A descendent
Of the chosen people
Crushed
By the Diaspora

I fed her
In the slums of Bogotá
A shadow
Of long forgotten times
Abandoned
By her beauty



I took her
From the slums of Bogotá
To a place of light
A dangerous and risky place
A safe place
That Place

She finds me
In the gardens of That Place
When my darkness
Turns to black
Captured in unbearable shades
Of torture



She holds me
In the corridors of That Place
When immortal memories
Reopen the wounds
From a haunting past
Of violence

She feeds me
In the twilights of That Place
When my hunger for her flesh
Awakens MyEgo
In an orgiastic environment
Of lust



We go back to our past sometimes
Together now
Inseparable
Not alone anymore
Walking hand in hand
Down streets and alleys
On shores and battlegrounds
To taste its filth again
To inhale its grim reality and despair
To weep and comfort each other
To cherish the roots
That make us One

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