Friday, January 27, 2012

Corrective measures

That i’m not a fan of punishing, humiliating and degrading people when it comes to d/s in general and femdom in particular is all over this blog as well as in my comments elsewhere. I essentially differ in that from the majority of women who consider themselves dominant, as well as from many males and females calling themselves subs or slaves, telling the world they r practicing same and believe this stuff is inherent to what they call the “lifestyle” or “the scene”. I find activities like that disgusting, ridiculous, and making femdom only an extension of a society based on patriarchal principles, norms, values, and religious dogmas.

The daily dose of twaddle in blogs, forums, and groups about all those important household chores, like doing dishes and laundry, as a token of how dedicated one is to one’s wife, how grateful one is to be living under her rule, and getting corner time, having to write lines, or receiving a hairbrush spanking, when having failed to do same according to her strict instructions, or Lilith forbid having violated some other holy set of FLR rules or protocols, convinced me that these practitioners never mentally left their childhood status, and r trying to re-enact the relationship they once had with their mother, teachers in kindergarten, elementary or Sunday school. Reward, punishment, sin, repentance, worship, guilt, and absolution, r key concepts here. Freud and his followers would have claimed that these people would be happiest if they only could return to the womb. He also would have argued that some males feel so guilty for having a penis, that they want the thing to be locked up by their spouse, fantasizing she would have the guts to throw the key away. Not having orgasms seems to be trendy in those environments. Of cors there r also other reasons why men r into chastity. For instance, to sublimate impotence. Frigid women cheer guys like that, relieved as they r from performing themselves.

Often i see these so called slaves and subs as panting dogs, trying to please their master in an attempt to receive some praise in return for a job well done. No wonder that in these circles pet play is in. Lying breathless and leashed at her feet, licking same with unstoppable enthusiasm, is a common fantasy as well.

To dissociate myself from all this, i’ve called mine, feminine femdom, and the one that sprouted from patriarchal philosophy and male fantasy, vanilla femdom. Women who r lured into the latter, or enter this realm voluntarily, i baptized mommy-dommes.

Of cors this brought me an avalanche of criticism, hate, bans from forums, resistance, accusations, lots of name calling and foul language from people claiming it is their sacred right to trespass into territories which r not theirs (and never will be theirs), and to take over which can’t be taken over. After years of having observed this banality, in a way i’m still flabbergasted with their resistance to give their fantasies and actions a different label. But no, they keep on insisting that what they’re doing has everything to do with female domination and slavery. Most if not all subscribe to something called the loving female authority. Of cors the loving one is severely punishing her loved one when needed. Sounds familiar eh? Yeah, that's right, it’s similar to a religion where the good Lord is loving each and everyone…………….. as long as u do as he says. And if not? Well then u r in for a treat. Then thou shalt be punished and be brought down to hell. No wonder so many women in “the scene” expect their humble servants to address them with Goddess. And remember, no hanky panky at the side eh? It’s all monogamous. Exactly as their heavenly father ordered them to be and to stay like that forever and ever.

So, i will keep correcting them whenever i’m in the mood to do so. Not as a quest or a mission, but simply to keep them awake and to remind them not forget what their true colors actually r.

Naturally this is just one example of me taking corrective measures, and a minor one at that. I only brought it up, to give some perspective to the rest of this blog, and to make sure that all of u understand, that when i punish, humiliate, or degrade people, it will never have anything to do with feminine femdom.

Basically there r two situations in which i take corrective measures:
1. Seeking justice and revenge
2. Educating non-slaves

Seeking justice and revenge.

It’s no secret: I don’t trust any legal system. Ad nauseam people have tried to convince me that laws r there to serve us, to protect us, to give us justice when we were done wrong, and to save us from potential scams, crimes, and other lowlife activities. I wanted to believe them, as i too think that in principle laws could be all that. I even would add that laws could keep some of us from being tempted to do the wrong thing. But, like it is with so many good things, people r messing around with them, making them just another tool, to mislead, corrupt and abuse. Lawsuits became a game, where judges, prosecutors and lawyers r seeking fame, finding (or creating) loopholes, and r trying to interpret the law to their advantage, with little attention to do the right thing. It became a circus, and i’m done with that. The only time i’m willing to go to court is when it concerns minor stuff like winning an administrative disagreement or a money conflict linked to one of my companies. In those cases i rarely give acte de présence myself, leaving it to a team of hotshot vanilla bureaucrats to represent me, and to fight over the banality. I’m not seeking justice then. Nor revenge. The outcome is not really important to me. I just want to win. Which i mostly do. And if i lose? So be it.

How different this is when it’s getting personal, when one of my intimi or moi is harassed, threatened, or hurt. Then i won’t go with, nor would i rely upon, the law, the police, the judges, the prosecutors and the lawyers. Then a lot of what i wrote a few blogs back comes into session. Then i take things into my own hands. Then justice will be done. My justice. My revenge. At times this also comes into picture when i’m confronted with a horrible event outside of my inner circle, in the streets, a bar, a disco, a subway, etc.

Let me tell u a few short stories, for u to get the feel of what i mean.

1. After having participated in a conference at the Universidad Rafael Urdaneta, Alejandra and i went for a stroll in Parque La Marina. I noticed a group of men looking at us. Nothing unusual so far. Punks do that all the time. But they split up, with three of them following us, while the rest faked to have other interests, proceeding to walk in the same direction never the less. Then i knew, all of them belonged to what i would call scum of the Earth. Once in the park, two of them tried to hook up with us by making the usual stupid remarks about how pretty we were, and that the four of us could have such a marvelous time together if we would allow them to take us out, and more of that nonsense. Naturally it was only an attempt to get us off guard, to not pay attention to the third one who kept silent, staying a little behind, and the ones who tried to make us believe they already forgot about us all together. We tried to stay polite, and made it very clear to them we were not interested in their advances or company. Gradually the situation became tense, and more and more dangerous. It was that time when most people would try to get out of the situation, run, call for help, the police, or something. But we r not like most people. We, and especially i, come from a past where we were taught to take care of ourselves, and not wait for help, which btw mostly never comes, or way too late. Suddenly, but not to our surprise, the so called disinterested group appeared in front of us. We were surrounded. We acted fast, and mercilessly. In the end the one that had stayed behind, was left with a broken wrist and a bullet, coming from his own weapon, in his shoulder, while Don Juan and his amigo were confronted with several broken ribs, crushed testicles, and rather severe head injury. Once they saw what was happening to their friends, and their decaying brain matter had convinced them of the reality that we were not the easy prey they had thought, the rest of the gang wisely took to their heels, and left us in peace. B4 we went on our way, we called an ambulance to get the wounded idiots to an ER, then continued our stroll, and ended up making love to each other.

2. I love to dance. Especially on the floors of sleazy bars and discos in the more rough neighborhoods of metropolitan areas like NYC, LA, Buenos Aires, Rio, Johannesburg, Amsterdam, and Tel Aviv. I find it awesome to completely letting myself go in places like that, where nobody cares who and what u r, as long as u can dance, drink, and be wild. It’s there where i get the most out of making men and women crazy about me, and to want me to such an extent, that they would not hesitate to kill for having raw sex with me. It turns me on tremendously when they actually start fighting over me. If u would see me then, all sweaty and horny in my black and shiny latex mini-dress and heels, dancing provocatively and shamelessly making eyes at u, u also would join my cattle, unable to resist making a pass at me. And sure enough there would be plenty of others trying to prevent u from succeeding. It’s MyEgo showing herself in a vanilla environment, looking for trouble and sex. So far so good. Everything still cool and dandy.

I went to the ladies room during such a dissipation in Rio, and found a girl on the floor, bleeding. It turned out she was raped. Probably by more than one person. I had never met her, but couldn’t stop thinking of how she must have felt during the attack(s), the pain, the agony, the helplessness, and now the horrible aftermath of same, the physical and mental damage, the inevitable interrogations, the eyes of her friends, the gossip, and the uncertainty if she ever would find justice. So i gathered with a few friends, and set out to find the lowlifes who had done this to her. It’s then when having a lot of money comes in handy. We found a few rats soon. From there on it was an easy task to locate the culprits. I’ll spare u the graphical details of what we did to them. Suffice to say that justice was done. Real justice. Swiftly and cruelly.

3. Once, during a mission in the ME, i was captured by the enemy, and thrown into a filthy room for interrogation. For several days i had to endure intense vanilla cruelty from a couple of men who hated me for what i was and represented. I could barely manage the pain during the torture sessions they conducted on me. But i was trained for this, and the people who selected me for the jobs i had applied for voluntarily, had assessed me well. They knew i would rather die, than to give away any information. They knew i would want to dominate any situation, to stay on top of it, in absolute control, to drive my opponents into insanity by my behavior, to never give in, and to make them feel inferior to me, no matter what. Still, after a couple of days, deprived from food, drink, sleep, and having been tortured and raped several times, i felt lost, abandoned, and without any belief of a rescue. What kept me going was to fuel my intense hate for the people who were doing this to me to the extremes, by making up scenarios in my mind of how i would take terrible revenge on them should i ever get back my freedom. At the same time reality had made it very clear to me that i had to prepare myself for execution.

And then it happened. There was a noise. In came my people. Hardened men, brazen, and determined to get me out of there. Like thieves in the night they stole me from our enemy, and carried me away from my hell hole. Wounded and weakened, but not broken. I was saved.

On our way home, still in enemy territory, they came after us. We ambushed them. It was then i took my revenge for real. The simple sight of my torturers gave me back my strength. My comrades knew what i was capable of, but still were amazed and terrified when they saw my rage and fury and the final result of same.

There’s more. For instance when i corrected a couple of kkk members who deemed it necessary to exercise their right of free speech, or when i revenged Shirah’s death, and the time i went after a group of neo-nazis who firebombed a synagogue in Paris. But i prefer not to go on, and think u got my drift by now.

I hate violence! Still i’ve used it many times, and, although reluctant, very willing to use it again. It is the only language understood by scumbags, fascists, criminals, racists, their brethren and followers. It’s the best way for having a fruitful conversation with them, to solve a problem, to teach them respect, to instill fear, and to make them rethink their actions in the future. No bureaucratic process, diplomacy, jail time, rehabilitation center, or political negotiation, can match direct and merciless action against creeps like that. Not that violence ever gave me joy or satisfaction. Sure there was that rush of the moment. That feeling of doing the right thing, to enforce justice or taking revenge for me or someone else. The aftermath always brought me sadness tho, staying with me for a long time. Still there was never regret either.

Educating non-slaves

Back in 2009 i wrote : “I met plenty males who wanted to grovel for me, to lick the dirt off my boots, to be pissed in their mouth by me, to be whipped by me, to be humiliated by me, me a woman, one belonging to the weaker sex. And i tell u, i kicked, pissed, whipped, spat, whacked, tortured, and humiliated these males to exhaustion. And they loved it. The time came however, i discovered that in fact i was used by them. Like all other women, i went into their trap, having the illusion that i was their mistress, ruling them, while in fact i was acting according to their rules, by pleasing them, by humiliating them, by beating them to pulp etc. And i went into it eagerly, cos i really wanted to be a domina.” And i continued with: “All this has changed now, as can easily be deducted from my other blogs.”

Then came the years i developed the concept of feminine femdom, completely averse to patriarchal culture, norms, values, concepts, and fantasies, but entirely congruent with my desire to be the only one who decides what is done and not done. At any cost, and any consequence. And that’s how i live now for a number of years already.

Strange things can happen tho. Since some time, i found myself more and more attracted to crack down on those bragging wannabe slaves, those silly FLR types, and especially those quasi sophisticated and academic types, who seem to have a need to constantly inform us about their pedestrian femdom insights, patriarchal d/s fantasies, and boring daily FLR adventures. Oh, and not to forget those revolutionary activists, those self proclaimed leaders and scholars of the kinky world, who made it their mission to enlighten the rest of the rookies, to fight for their rights, to converse on higher levels with more developed/graduated non-slaves and mommy-dommes, and to convince their audiences that anything goes as long as it’s consensual and against the old establishment. I can’t stand them, cos when the heat is really on, when it gets dangerous, they easily back off, and want, even claim, the protection of the same people and systems they only felt contempt for and “fought” against, the time they felt safe to do so.

And no, i don’t mean in the usual way, the vanilla femdom way. I’m talking here to really go out into their world, really granting them their wishes, really fulfilling their desires and fantasies. But not like i did as described in my quote above, but with a deliciously sardonic twist. What does that mean? It means i take them on a tour, way beyond their boldest expectations. Lemme explain.

After having hooked up with my next victim (a.k.a. submissive alpha male), for instance in a fetish/sm club, and discussed with him the terms of our engagement (ssc eh?) at length, he feels at ease and comfortable, fully trusting me, and anticipating the time of his life. Then i take him to my place. No, no, no, not to the Labyrinth, and certainly not to That Place, but to a location some would call the dungeon of love, cruelty and despair. In that order, hehehe. Once there, everything changes. No more ssc crap. None of it! His desires and fantasies? Yeah right. Maybe in the beginning he still believes i will follow up on our agreement. Gradually his anticipation and trust will evaporate tho, making place for fear, agony, and an uncontrollable drive to get out, to escape from me, to go home to his loving female authority, far away from this awful domina he initially was dreaming of, but who managed to turn his dreams into a horrible nightmare.

To really degrade, humiliate, and dehumanize types like that the MyEgo way, and certainly not their way, excites me these days beyond my own belief. MyEgo way of degrading, humiliating, and dehumanizing a man is not play! I’m truly going for it, putting the pressure on him, making him feel a zero, a toy, a piece of shit, for him to realize that he’s not the slave he thought he was (and never will be), now that he finally met with a woman who doesn't play the game his way, a woman teaching him what it really means to beg, to beg without any result, any relief, to experience timeless torture, and true indifference regarding his desires, wishes, and fantasies. An arrogant and haughty woman, who openly and shamelessly makes him aware of the fact that she is in it for herself only, who is using him for her own satisfaction, mocking him for his lousy performance, his inadequacy to hold an erection under her severe whippings, laughing at his whimpering and tears, who considers him a simple and exchangeable tool, a non-human, a worthless worm, a filthy doormat, a disposable thing. Something he wanted to be, but never dared to admit. Something he wished for, but never wanted to come true. And now it happened. A whole new femdom dimension was added to this poor fellow’s thinking. He will never be the same, and traumatized for the rest of his FLR life. If there still will be one, hehe. And if, it will not last very long, cos the next time he’s “playing with his mistress”, he will feel lousy and think back, longing for me, and finding his wife a bad example of dominance. And she will feel it too. Maybe she will be relieved, lol. Back to good old and safe vanilla. A man can do laundry, dishes, and run errands then too, u know. Even kneel and lick her feet sometimes. Oh happy days.

Alpha males? Not in those places. Submissive alpha males? Only when they r pampered by their loving female authority.

I’m not only doing this in private. Humiliating a non-slave in public has it charm too. Making a character like that suck on the heels of my boots in a mall or the lobby of a hotel is hilarious. The trick is to get them down on their knees. Once there, there is no way back for them, no return. They will feel ridiculous, ashamed, and weak under the eyes of the crowd, but they won’t stop pleasing me. It’s like as if they’re hypnotized, and thus will do anything i tell them to do, no matter how disgusting, degrading, or dangerous. If u r a woman and, while reading this, felt a little tingle down or up there, u should try this once. Great way to find out if u r a feminine femdom too :)

Yes i know. I said it many times. I hate teaching. And it’s true! But there’s that other side of me too eh? I’m always ready to straighten people out, to help them to do the right thing, to educate them by showing them who they really r, and also to safe mommy-dommes from a terrible fate. What? U don’t know what their fate will be? Well think about it for a while, take ur time, and i’m sure it will come to u.


  1. well said Ma'am Ayesha...feminine femdom is the true spirit of femdom...i dont know i am intelligent enough to understand You...but to me this femdom is enslavement of soul...or i can say a true worship from heart and a pious man worshiping in a jungle..he dont know what is happening around....same is the case when someone is worshiping a goddess...

    1. The thing is, there r no goddesses.

      My slaves know exactly what's going on. Unless i don't want them to know, hehe. Which can be very entertaining, and adding to the zest of what's going on.

      And.....sometimes i don't want to know what's going on myself. Then i change into my ostrich outfit, knowing perfectly well these birds never stick their head into the sand. They always know what’s going on, u know?

    2. hahahaha...i think You always knew whats going on but sometimes it looks interesting to pretend that you dont know:)

    3. Well, that's right. But not so much to make it look interesting. Pretending not to know is more a tool to make people feel safe to continue with their stupid behavior, while actually they r digging their own grave. But they don't know that. Till it is too late.

      Honestly tho,many times i really don't care what's going on.

    4. Ma'am Ayesha sometimes it looks cool to pretend that You know nothing about things going on.In this way one can see true colors of people.But yeah if a person is strong like You then it is good for Her not to care about whats going on..Beacuse in the end that person can turn the tables and make things like She wants too see.

    5. Sometimes i'm simply too lazy to care, and rather keep goofing off. That's all.

  2. Mistress Ayesha,

    Your posts rings with a truthful clarity which is rare. I thank you greatly.

    I agree with you. Your stance is very similar to Mistress Rika, as I garner from reading her book. If you want to turn your husband into your child, punish him. Ms. Rika instead suggests punishments are ‘male centric’ activities that are given to him as a treat on occasion as a concession to his twisted male desires.

    I would ask you to reconsider your stance on male chastity. I have found a pronounced effect to prolonged enforced chastity on my behavior. It is clear as good crystal to me that there is bio-chemistry involved. A chaste submissive man is more content and docile. You are, of course, free to disagree, but I have found this to be truthful, through my own experience.



    1. I understand there is a huge variety in human relationships, within which people feel safe, nurture each other and can reach to incredible levels of excitement and satisfaction. And yes indeed, it seems that there r a number of men who, for whatever reason, discovered chastity to be a great thing, and want it to be, or become, an integral part of their love life. Going by the word of their testimonies, so did and do their women. And that's fine with me. Go on and do ur thing.

      It's not for me tho. I don’t want this kind of harmony. I don't want content and docile men around me. On the contrary. I want them to come after me, to seduce me. To get me into the mood to do terrible things to them. Things they want too, things they actually can’t live without, but fear as well. And not "as a treat" or "a concession to his twisted male desires". Their desires r not twisted. Far from it. Their desires r genuine, raw, and belong to their personality like their cock belongs to their body. I force them into exploding orgasms under circumstances where vanilla men only would get limp, cry, and faint. Chastity has no place here.

  3. Lady Ayesha,
    Allow me the honor to thank you each time i read a new post. It is about sharing honestly and with passion the essence of what you have worked out hardly and experienced with the cost of swift or sometimes pain and blood. Should you not like to call it teaching that is fine as long as the Ones reading learn something from or at least start questioning themselves.
    Every system is imperfect and people who creates them are most of the time the first to manipulate it to fit their needs or to empower the rules and dogmas that strengthen their positions or roles.
    You have clearly shared your point of view for actions that can bring a bit more justice within those corrupted systems.
    However, how much people on earth actually, have enough experience,power,culture,training and power to do or act the same like you did on many occasions? and in case there is thousand: Still the motivation could be different and consequently those actions or reactions empower those systems instead of balancing a bit.
    you brought with Chaos more awareness, with decadence more values, with hate more passion, with suffer more freedom, with punishment more justice,with satisfying your ego more indulgence, etc... Either it is called Feminine Femdom or whatever else,it is a proven applied successful theory and worth more adherent to join :)
    Unfortunately,being a male and not brave enough to be called slave nor physically fit to survive the path to the labyrinth, I am still honored to thank you again as a devotee for the time, thoughts and life experience you are sharing from many years freely and graciously despite the lot of attacks and aggression you witnessed.

    1. To know who and what u r, to truly question same when feeling not at ease with urself, having the courage to admit when failed to instill the desired adjustments, but still keep on trying, while at the same time acknowledging the reality of the core of ur personality, makes u special, and a member of that elite group of humans of which there can never be enough. One to be loved, envied, respected, and taken as a model.

      When i look at ur face, and into ur eyes, i just know, u r one of them.

      I salute u, and cherish ur friendship.

  4. Mistress Ayesha,

    When I say a submissive is content, it is the same form of contentment a masochist has when bound, blindfolded, ball-gagged, with binder-clips on their nipples and sharp pain coursing through their body they can do nothing about. A submissive man in prolonged chastity experiences sexual frustration non-stop. However, there is also courtship behavior invoked which makes his desire to please the women be a driving force.

    You mention you enjoy to have your men driven wild with desire for you to do as you please with. It is this tormented state which I content they should be kept in perpetuity, without the relief orgasm brings.



    1. When my slaves reach the point of orgasm, it's not a relief, but the icing on the cake. I want them to have it, and i want them to have it together with me. Well ... um ....most of the times, as i could have had one already b4 they r moving into that region of sex :)

      A tormented state? Maybe as a preliminary, a playful foreplay for things to come. Of cors it's a different story when i'm going out to correct non-slaves. As i said, this can excite me, but it's a far cry from when i am with my people. One can't compare the 2. Two different galaxies.

  5. Ayesha,

    Your galaxy is so far beyond what males like me have experiended, that i can only read and stupidly try to comprehend. One day, maybe i will find out first hand what you really know. Feminine Femdom.

    1. U r not alone in this, but in contrast to many braggers claiming they r already there, u have the guts and insight to admit u still may have a long way to go. Doing so publicly makes this even more special!

  6. I got to this blog through another blog and i was curious about this post.
    Punishing bad people is one thing which i encourage and feel is necessary of course, but breaking men just for the heck of it is pretty fucked up, and guess what? They were never men of real value and integrity. Cause no matter how seductive, sexy, dominant you are, real men with values have a vision, have principles and would never bend backwards for anyone whether it's a male or a female. The same way you would prefer dying before someone get to control you it's the same way with them. But at least those men dont treat women like crap either, which is something you enjoy doing to guys from some of the examples you mentioned above. It's really messed up, you talk about wanna-be male slaves who don't know anything about submission while there are the exact same thing with girls, and it's not about not knowing how to serve, it's about that many people have their limits, unlike you, many people do it for both the partners' pleasure, not just from the mere satisfaction of making a person suffer.
    I think killing so many people has killed your heart itself, and you may look sexy from the outside (i will never know), but i assure you if i knew about you before talking to you i wouldn't even approach you, cause all this rage and hatred and love for revenge inside you kills everything.
    Just wanted to give you a piece of my mind, you can delete this post after reading it, i wont get on this blog again so there is no need to reply. you can consider me another hater or something. but i just pray i dont approach a girl one day with a smile and willingness to talk or escalate it into something beautiful and find out that that girl is you.

    1. ".....i wont get on this blog again" Oh i see, u only wanted to lay ur frustrated egg in my nest and anonymously disappear again. It's my bet tho, u will return on the sly, or made sure to receive an email in case there would be a reply.

      Real men with values u say? R u one of them, Sir Anon Mouse?